The meeting last night was interesting. Just four of us in the group. The other ladies are all attractive, well groomed women who just need to lose some weight. The one thing that made me a little sad is how unhappy their weight makes them. They seem defined by it. I said that there are positive things about being heavier and things that I'll miss when the weight is gone and the group leader suggested that I was in denial about my weight. That remark certainly stung and has given me something to think about.
I woke up this morning ready to get started and had a bowl of LL porridge for breakfast. It wasn't like any porridge I've had before, very powdery, but slightly sweet and perfectly edible. I had it with a black iced coffee (no milk on LL). I was feeling good about getting started and weighed myself before getting into the shower. My body was obviously trying to send me a message - I weighed the most I have ever weighed in my life. Including when I was 9 months pregnant. 190lbs! I am more determined than ever to sort myself out.
Today is my 10 year old's birthday. We're going to see a movie and go out to lunch. This is going to be a challenge. I'm trying to keep the fact of this diet from the children. I don't want for them to grow up with food issues. I've decided to sit down to lunch with everyone, have a drink and then go and get my eyebrows done. We're going to the mall so it should be easy. Fingers crossed.
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